If friendship is an obligation

My wife offered me a quote I very much like in response to trying to help a member of the church understand that I consider it part of my role to be there for persons having major surgery - or even minor surgery - if it is their desire. The quote ran, "If friendship is an obligation, then I'm obligated." I think that is true through and through. When we become friends with someone, opening our lives and sharing at many levels, there is an obligation that becomes part of that relationship - being there! It matters not that the matter is trivial, from someone's point of view, or that it is uncomfortable, or that it is socially unacceptable. The obligation is there, and perhaps the test of friendship is to see if that "friend" is there in your time of need.

I've also heard the disturbing thought shared that pastors should never become friends with their congregants. I find that disturbing because I don't know how we are to truly minister to the needs of peoples lives if we do not become friends. It seems to me to be like saying Jesus wasn't friends with those who followed him. He actually tells them I call you friends. I think pastors are to walk that same walk - calling people friends, sharing the difficulties of life as a disciple and supporting them even when they walk away or break trust.

Speaking of friends, I have long had the best of best friends in the lovely lady that agreed to take my name and share my life over 35 years ago! She tweaks me to get grins. She braces me when I get off kilter, and through it all, I know that she is there for me! That's true friendship - and one I wouldn't trade from all the money, power and fame in the world!

So, I would wish for all of you a friend who can teach you the truth of that little quote!

Peace!