The Learning Continues

My new adventure into becoming a Walgreen's photo tech continues with lots of learning everyday. Yesterday I opened - that is I got both the film and paper processors turned on, tested and ready to roll. I also put a new roll of the print paper in the paper cannister, being very careful because one of my co-worker's did it last week, and a paper jam ensued. I also was asked to correct a problem with another cannister - that required a little assistance from one of the better trained techs, and even he had some trouble with it.

I have also learned that we are the department within the store that covers more of what needs to be done than any other! Photo also covers the coolers, the food shelves, the vitamin and pharmacy shelves, and the stationary and photo frame/album aisle. When it is time to deal with sale tags for a week or monthly sale - we have more tags to hang.

I learned yesterday that at the beginning of the month we pull expired food items from the shelves - I did that, and was complimented and told I had done too much because Frito-Lay is supposed to do their own.

I'm off n0w until I start to work the end of this week at the new store, helping to set up the store and get it ready to open.

So, what does this have to do with pastoral duties? Well, let me just say that I have done a bit of counseling with a co-worker working off some anger over past experiences that still bother her. I have listened to customers and tried to help them with difficulties, and have worked hard to counter prejudices that have come up in my presence - but gently. And I'm helping people!

What makes this better than being in a church? When I clock out, I'm done! I don't have people second guessing me all the time! No Board claims I just won't listen, while in fact they are not listening to me. I ask when I don't know, learn more about my position and continue to find ways to help! I'm looking forward to the new store and the development of our team.

So, the adventure and the learning continue apace! Peace!

The New Adventure

Well, I've started a new job, and if it works out, my ministry may turn to being there for other pastors. I'm training as a photo tech with the possibility of becoming the team lead at a brand new Walgreen's store in Evergreen, Colorado. I've had a week of training and seem to be coming along nicely. I've made some mistakes, asked some questions more than once, but I am learning what I need to know. The biggest thing over the next week and a half is to get 17 computer modules completed per my new manager's wishes. I've worked the opening shift and the closing shift. I've processed film - it's all automated, taken orders, run the register and helped get the shelves lined with sale tags and kept up their appearance.

The thing I think I like most is the ability to walk away from the job at night and know that I'm not likely to get called for an emergency, not needing to go to a meeting where someone will light in to me for a difference of opinion instead of dealing with the facts. I'm here, I serve our customers and my fellow employees, I do my job, then I get to go home to my wife, and not need to boil over for a hour to become even close to being able to sleep. I can play computer games with my daughter for the sheer enjoyment of the games without NEEDING to bash "booglies" to slow down and get rid of frustrations.

You know, now that I think of it, shouldn't the church also be able to let their pastor go home that way? Why do we seem to feel a need to dump all our frustration and anger on the one person who is supposed to be there to help us? Why do we feel the need to argue with the one who has the training to help guide the changes we might need to make? Where in those beloved scriptures does it say the pastor is the whipping member of the church? I know Jesus spoke of the first being the last, but I'm not sure he was referring to the pastor being the crapper of the church. I truly think the Savior was saying we ALL need to come down off our high horses, get used to the idea that we are CALLED to MINISTRY and SERVICE, roll up our sleeves and ALL strive to do the work of the Christ in our world - not pay someone a salary and require them to forget their own life in order to fulfill the dreams and wants of everyone else.

Some of my anger has come to the fore, but that's alright because Jesus wasn't slow to tell the disciples or the listening crowds where they were failing and how to get it right - though I'm not sure he had much more success than pastors do in that regard. Perhaps the time has come for pastors to reassert the prophetic role once again, and call a few spades by their rightfully earned names. May the quite humble folk of the church need to find their voices and tell some of those big-money-loudmouths to sit down and shut up, or take their money and find another place to bully folk into being an extension of their desire to be pampered - because there is ministry to be done here, and only action people are desired. Wow! That's quite a dream, but it just might be the dream necessary for Christianity to reassert its rightful place in the world, to make the whole voice of Christianity heard instead of one hate-filled strand.

Anyway, the new job is pretty nice for a change, and I've given you a bit to chew on!

Peace!

Here's to Irena!

My brother sent me a You.tube portion of the Glen Beck show telling the story of Irena Sendler, a Polish woman who worked for the Welfare Department in Poland as Hitler began his final solution. She was in charge of controlling TB, and used her restriction-less freedom to smuggle over 2500 Jewish children out of the ghetto in Poland - carrying them in toolboxes, caskets, gunny sacks and in ambulances accompanied by her trusted friend and cohort - a dog that would bark incessantly while she was questioned, so the Gestapo officers wouldn't hear the crying children.

When she was caught, she was tortured and beaten mercilessly, but escaped execution by bribing a guard and living in secret until the war was over. Not wanting the children to lose their true identities, she had written their names down, buried them in a jar by an apple tree in her backyard. After the war's conclusion, she retrieved the list and began helping the children rediscover their true identity and place many of those whose parents had died during the war and the Final solution with family members.

Glen Beck mentions that he heard of her because she was nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize. My gut reaction is to state without fear of error that there are literally hundreds who have similar stories of heroism and simple true compassion for persons caught in the hate-filled hands of dictators and tyrants. Glen Beck had to end her wonderful story taking a shot at a political figure. That's too bad, because it cheapened his sharing of her wonderful story, and it demeaned the announcer himself.

God's speed on your new venture in God's new realms, Irena, and thanks for the ideal to live up to!

Peace!

Huzzah!

The drought is over! I applied to Walgreen's on-line, because they have a new store opening in Evergreen, where my beloved is working. Two days after I completed what you can do from home I received a call from the manager of the new store. He could offer the position for which I had applied, but like the application enough to want to interview me. By the time that was done, he was saying he would like me to work in another department that would give me nearly a dollar an hour more in pay, and train me to help set up the store, possible to become the team lead - more pay and a first step on the way to management.

I won't be making what I did, nor as much as my beloved has been told she will make when her training is over, but it is income and there is the possibility of more, and of advancement. Sounds like a pretty good start to me! If it goes as well as we hope, and nothing truly exciting appears on the pastoral search front, it may be time for a mid-life career change, away from the frustrations of churches that don't want to be part of the future except for the people and money, away from the people who cannot exert control in their own lives so they do it by making the church a miserable place to be, away from people expecting you to be there 24-7-365. I have to admit that right now a steady job I can leave behind at the end of the shift sounds very nice, and I'm sure I can find a pastor in a local church that would be glad to have a listening ear with a little experiential commonality to support with my companionship and support.

I am thankful to my family for their confidence that this would come about, though I confess I was starting to doubt it as applications were filed and nothing resulted. This feels wonderful!!

Peace!

A Sign of the Times?

There has been a lot of talk about personal responsibility for the last 8 years - and now we have a sign of it's outcome - a higher teen birth rate than last 15 years! Why does this bother me? Teens are prepared to be parents - heck, few us adults are truly prepared! Furthermore, in our society it is the young woman who pays for her birthing a child, and the baby's father walks free in most cases, only laughing with "adult" males about sowing his wild oats!

It has been about that same 8 years that the emphasis has been on abstinence only, forgetting that only the studies done by ab-only groups show any success at all. During that time, I and others have fought for a comprehensive approach to teens and sexuality - including education, contraception and urging our youth to wait - to no avail with the current administration and their religiously right-wing allies who have pushed more and more for ab-only programs as the only approach to take - stating that education actually encourages sexual activity though studies show otherwise, stating that contraception increases a desire to become active - ignoring the thousands of young girls in our country raped by male members of their households or families that have no choice in the matter, and creating the "re-virgining" myth that if a sexually active girl is inactive for so long, she becomes a virgin all over.

It's so twisted, is it any wonder the kids do or say what is expected in both the church or group pushing ab-only and in the back seat of a car or a bedroom of a home without active concerned parents? I've even known parents who said, "The kid's going to do it anyway, so I just have them do it here so I know what's going on." Now there's a healthy attitude! NOT!!!

Come on, people, it's time we place more trust in our children and teach them what they need to know to face an ever-more complex world. After all, if we let them do it all by trial and error, will we have any room to complain when they pack us off into homes that allow them to shirk responsibility just as we have? Think about it, then go talk honestly and bluntly with your children about the whole gamut of sexual information - or find someone who will do it because you are too embarrassed to talk to your beloved child. Parents, grow up, and act your role!

Peace!

Along the way

Along life's paths we get surprises that are important to help us keep our positive perspective - such as total strangers offering help, friendship, concern - if only we are willing to see them and acknowledge them. Moving into this apartment complex has shown plenty of people more than willing to help - even more than in the heartland area of central Iowa where we used to live.

It causes me to pause and reflect on the manner that we delude ourselves into thinking we live in a cold, distant, compartmentalized world where it is possible to become a hermit within a city. I know that this is possible, but I also know that the world isn't quite as insular as we might like to believe. I've had conversation with persons from East and West Germany, with Hispanics, Blacks, Asians and Northern Europeans. All were delighted to compare thoughts, to enjoy simple human companionship, and to simply be together. I've listened to those in my youth (and later) who said "those" people moving in would destroy the neighborhood, and more than once have actually seen "those" people actually enhance the neighborhood by keeping up their property, living quietly friendly lives and working to pay their way - while some of the complainers had trashy property, noisy obnoxious home lives, and were constantly looking for someone to bail them out of their self-induced problems.

I've had strangers along highways stop to help with automobile troubles, and offered help. I've had hotel and motel staff go out of their way to help with problems - even more so than would normally be associated with keeping a good image. I've witnessed waitresses, chefs and managers of restaurants go far out of their way to accommodate my wife's food allergies.

See? The world still has a preponderance of good people, we've just become used to noticing the nasty and difficult ones. Open your eyes, and you might get the surprise of your life - you might be one of the nasty, difficult people you complain about so much!

Think about it and try it! Practice random acts of kindness and see how the world can change - one person at a time. The commercial is right, a smile is contagious and very effective at change!

Peace!

Moving In

I was fortunate enough to have another of those experiences that counters the usual perception of today's youth and young adults being all about themselves. We arrived from Iowa on Wednesday, and Thursday night our daughter and three friends from work arrived - and 7 hours later two trucks were unpacked and furniture was in the apartment along with most of the kitchen stuff. We have been back each day since (spending the nights at our daughter's) to unpack and get a little closer to actually moving in - which happens today.

We are looking forward to getting more of our things in and settling. This week will also see the beginnings of the search for employment. This is a worry, though we do try to remember what we share about our faith - that God will meet our needs. I'll be making a trip by the office of the Rocky Mountain Conference of the United Church of Christ to see about preaching or interim opportunities that can put a little spending money in our account.

I've gotten a new Hewlett Packard Notebook to replace my old Dell that died just before the move. Now the problem is trying to download the game my daughter and I enjoy playing together as a de-stressing exercise at the end of a day. I tried last night, and it popped up a message that it was having trouble saving, but if appeared to continue to download - but this morning - only an empty folder for it. We'll have to try it again.

Well, off to see what mischief I can get into!

Peace!

A Final Post

This will be my last post from Webster City, IA. I was delighted to come here, as there seemed so much promise in the situation here - excited people, a stated desire for change. I know I haven't fulfilled their desires, and I know they haven't been particularly open to my leadership. So, now we both simply declare that our time together is done. God will be the one to determine where we go from this point.

Friday night I begin what will be a packed weekend - no pun intended. I'll do the rehearsal for Saturday's wedding for a former Christian Education Director who was here during my time as pastor. Sunday will be the final service here, and it will include the baptism of a baby born to a couple whose marriage I performed. Saturday is also picking up and loading the truck. I don't know if we will be some place with internet possibilities again until we get where we are going and make arrangement for the service.

So, while you work your way through Thursday, my lovely bride and I will be tidying up in preparation for the loading of the truck. To my friends, I wish you all the best God can offer. To my detractors, I wish you all the best God can offer, and a prayer for God to create a new and positive, open and sharing spirit within each of you - for your sake and the church's.

God's peace be with us all!

Fear Factor

Ok, so I got a call last week that my name was being put in for a position that would have provided immediate employment, though short-term, and relieved a lot of the stress right now - I was to hear last night. Not so much! So the fear over what is happening rachets up another notch, and the unknown looms larger than before. I'm making an effort to find out what happened for sure. Perhaps someone just doesn't understand "time is of the essence" when applied to such a situation and my fears are groundless.

My lovely bride of 35 years had me read a friend's "911 Psalm" last night - which is an adaptation of Psalm 91 - Read it replacing "You" with me or us or appropriate pronouns and listen to the lesson of assurance. It was a powerful passage to read in this manner.

This is one of those times I try to remind myself of what I tell people about difficult situations - remember the poem "Footprints in the Sand," where when questioned about the single set of prints why God had left the struggling child alone, God replies, "But my child, those weren't times I left you alone, they were the times I carried you." But, as I well know, saying and doing are very different matters! I will try to look to my Master-example and rely on God's grace, but I know, I KNOW that matters of paying bills, having shelter and putting food on the table are going to weigh heavy on my mind until this is settled.

I keep trying to reassure my bride, but there is only so much reassurance that I can offer before I too am bereft of assurance to offer. Were I alone, I'd be lost, despondent and getting by on what I could - but I'm not, thank God!! This lovely, loving woman has made me what I am today - teaching me confidence, an ability to show my emotions, and that here with her is where I find my safe place, my resting place - my anger bleeds off in her presence, my hurt dissipates within her arms, my uncertainty seems to find resolution in our conversation!

And me? I'll continue to make my way through life, trying to ease the things that I can for my wife and others. I'll do my best to trust God's grace and walk humbly with my God. I pray that somehow I've been enough of a role model that others through my life and living have learned some of the same.

Peace!

Sad Commentary

I was taken to lunch yesterday by a colleague and friend, to say good bye after a too short friendship. We have kidded back and forth over my love of dark roast coffee for all the time we have counted each other friends, in what some would find abusive language, but it's always followed by a grin and probably a laugh.

So yesterday we are sitting in the restaurant, and my friend comments that our denomination, the United Church of Christ, will probably be destroyed because people have forgotten that we, like our United States of America, was founded on the proposition that in diversity we can find unity - in fact in that diversity is our strength.

Now, I don't know if he's reading the situation correctly or not as to the end result, but I can tell you he is dead on when it comes to the most difficult aspect of churches today! We do NOT want different or changed or new! We want comfortable, familiar, feel-good theology and hymns and liturgy. The fact that Jesus spent his entire career upsetting that apple cart in his time has no impact on the way people live today!

Another comment related to that was a question, "How many of your young people rush right out after church and put on church organ music to listen to?" And we wonder why they don't like church any more? Or how about the comment I heard a pastor shared with a parishoner complaining about change - "Oh, so you still go down to the river to do laundry? Still fire up the wood stove to cook on? Still drive around in a horse-drawn buggy?"

It's truly sad that the church has forgotten that Jesus said he came to bring life and abundantly! Life is change! Life is upsetting! Life is running into things we disagree with in people we like or need to get along with - and we do! So why can't we do it in church?

We complain about the medical community resorting to specialists on everything, but that is exactly what the church is trying to do - the pastor is the specialist regarding "church work" and that lets all the rest off the hook. The church staff are the specialists that allow the members to coast! WRONG!!!!

When that attitude becomes the life-view of a congregation, it will change or they will die! It is that simple, that stark, that harsh! A church needs to be like a lake - with fresh water coming in and old water flowing out - or like a pond with no such ingress and egress, it will become stagnant, nasty, unpleasant to be around, and eventually simply a stinking hole that is avoided.

That can also be said of the once great nation. All of it. We have the potential to be the greatest nation history has ever known, the shining example for all the world. But when we try to force people through a cookie cutter mold, try to make everyone exactly alike, refuse to live up to our grand heritage - "Give me your tired and huddled masses . . . " - we start to die like that pond, and, as we have seen, our image worldwide suffers!

'Tis time, my friends and my detractors, for us to start paying attention to life, to our faith, to the reality of need to change in order to live. Live? Die? That's each person's choice! What's yours?

Peace!

Another Step on the Journey

Another step on the journey of getting out of here was taken today when I finalized arrangements on the church's computer. All my personal files are off, and it will remain at the church from here on. I still have a committal, a wedding and a baptism to go. I will admit that I'm delighted to go out a high note with a wedding the day before my last Sunday and a baptism in my very last service at the church. It is still unclear what will happen regarding a farewell service.

The hardest part of this next three weeks will be dealing with the heart-broken folk coming to ask what they can do, how did this happen, who's behind this - all those difficult topics that there are no clear answers to. I listen, I offer the answers that I can, and I sit back to allow them to vent and find direction through their concerns for our friendship and the future of the church. For all in similar situations, church members that is, I would simply say that you must make yourselves aware of what happens in the church, make every effort to make your community of faith into a place where God and God's will are the paramount focus and all other considerations are only side issues to be discussed and agreed upon to be disagreed upon. Churches will be controlled by those who are willing to put forth the effort. Christians need to be willing to face the future knowing that God's message and service are true focus rather than budget and membership numbers.

Our big focus now is simply to be packed ahead of time. We have the kitchen about ready for the counter repair, and other rooms are nearing completion. AND we are LOOKING FORWARD to our weekend with family in Minnesota. So, back to the packing!

Peace!

Nearing the end

We have been diligent at packing, and are far ahead of the usual packing schedule, though not done. As we move closer to the end of our time here, it becomes harder to want to do the last of the packing, the last of the cutting loose ties that have formed, the last --

It's amazing to me that as much as we look forward to getting out of difficult situations, we still find it hard to cut all the ties. Some of those we leave are jumping for joy, others are saying "Oh, well, it happens" and going on, a few are truly expressing distress over what is happening. And they are the ones that make it most difficult to let go and go on.

Over the years, there have been many who affected us so, and they aren't forgotten, from the couple in our first church who gave our daughter her orange stool, to the couple who gave us so many worked rock book ends, to the woman in our second church who stood up for us when the church decided we were to leave two weeks before school was out, to the woman who refused to allow me to go into the water-filling basement to retrieve items for the men of the church preparing to move our things into storage, to the couple that stepped in with a loaner car when our own car froze the engine, to the folk of our third church that showed me how gracious a church can be through their care of our family through the death of my father and my wife's traumatic surgery on a cyst in her neck, to the folk in our fourth church that shared staunch support in the face of emotional reactionary stances and shared their humor with us, to the folk in the fifth church that repeatedly showed their love through caring extended to our daughter through her lupus treatment and research and their constant and abiding presence in our need, to the folk I've mentioned here.

That's what makes the leaving difficult even in the face of difficult standards, resistance to the change that is part of life itself, and uncertain future. I'm I wanting to stay here? No! But will there be pain at the departure? Yes!

Life is difficult. We go on!

Peace!

Part of History

Well, I proudly claim my part in a historic first! I've supported Senator Barak Obama since early in his candidacy. That support came because I liked his hope message, his note that we needed a change in Washington, not just in the White House. I have been very impressed by the positive tone of his campaign. Yes, there were moments of frustrated sniping, but who wouldn't when both the opposition and the main same-party candidate both attacked lack of experience. Exactly how prepared was the current occupant of the Oval Office? What fantastic credentials or enormously successful bi-partisan effort has that candidate produced?

We do need a change, and I think Barak Obama offers the best hope this nation has for the future - a future where we can start putting down some of the ideological cudgels and start rolling our sleeves up to work together for the betterment of our nation, and a return to our role as ethical and moral lights in the world.

We lost a lot of that over the last eight years, and now it's time to start building it back. I know Republicans I'm proud to name friends. Heck, I even worship with some of them! But until we all start to find that commonality of being citizens first, and political party members second; until we learn to put down our religious cudgels of conservatism and liberalism, straight and gay, male and female, and truly hear Paul's message that there are no distinctions now in Christ we will never accomplish what we can.

In the same vein, until our children and youth are heard, truly valued for their contributions and thoughts and made part of the planning for the future of the church, we will continue to dwindle in Mainline churches, and churches willing to make entertainment part of their appeal will continue to flourish - and Jesus will simply become another rules-carrying judge for humanity. The Body of Christ in America has to learn that Jesus repeatedly took Jewish Torah law and set it aside for the simple law of loving God completely and neighbor as self, that the old traditional judgments still bandied about by some religious expressions as the true measure of one's faith aren't any more valid today than when the Christ set them aside as human efforts to usurp God's mercy, compassion, forgiveness and love.

Barak Obama in the political sphere. Jesus, and only Jesus in my religious sphere, and God above all, in all, and loving all. Plain, simple, and oh, so difficult to grasp, isn't it.

Peace and squirmings!

Sad Freedom

There is a sadness even in gaining freedom from what seems an oppressive situation. Five years of work, and little to see for it. Oh, I know I've touched lives, helped people, created some new understanding. It's just that pastors as well as churches like to see growth, we often just have different views of how to accomplish said growth. And different understandings of how church ought to function. And I've been reminded because we've had situations that have come up over the five years repeatedly with the church parlimentarian saying this is how it needs to work based on the Constiitution, and people promptly announcing that ain't the way it's supposed to work. So, why would I feel bad about walking away from that?

Well, there have been friendships developed that will now be truncated. There have been dreams of staying until we retired that are dashed. There are hopes for what could be accomplished that are gone. There have been dreams of deeper involvment in the Conference that now will not occur - unless something miraculously changes in the next few weeks. Reason for sadness!

There is also the freedom that I won't need to go to meetings where people may listen, but in most cases won't care what I say about directions. I won't have to put up with surliness and suspicion and tw0-facedness. I'm hoping that this will shock the church enough that they will truly take the time to figure out who they are and what they want from a pastor. I'm hoping the tension that exists between the lifers and the newbies will be dealt with in a manner that will bring new strength, pride in heritage and a commitment to be the socially connected and active that has been the signature of this congregation through their long and storied history.

But my part is done. Farewell!

Next, a NEW CHAPTER!

Peace!

The End

Today I signed the letter detailing the terms of the severance package. Five years of ministry will come to an end just two weeks beyond that fifth anniversary. The issues are complex and deal with both myself and the church. There are people delighted that I'm not a piece of history for this community. There are others who will be devastated by this move. So how is this something that pertinent for the blog?

Well, here goes! Those delighted will point to my lack of cooperation with their desired direction, they will say I didn't listen to them. Those devastated will say but we didn't find any reason for this! We like his sermons, we appreciated his teaching and visits and counseling. The truth? It lies somewhere in the middle. I know I didn't fulfill all the desires of the congregation. I tried to move in direction of helping them see some new directions for ministry, and to understand that all the church growth studies I have heard or read say that long term sustained growth comes through the congregation instead of from the pastor. I tried to lead them into the direction of new forms of worship, new understandings of how the church reaches out to younger people.

I have listened to those who wanted me to function as a 1950's pastor in the twenty-first century when people are dual career families scheduled to the brow-line with sports, dance, school and family activities. I have tried to help them see that with that kind of scheduling, it's impossible to function as a 1950's pastor. I have not been successful, not to the smallest degree.

So what do I want now? Only a couple of things, that we can find a place to live, jobs, and healing. That the church will in fact figure out who they are, what they want, and if they want to survive - which will include a level of commitment that hasn't been evidence so far in my tenure.

God be with us all! Please, God!!

Peace!

Freight Train, Freight Train

A week ago, the member of the Church's Staff Parish Board told me, when I purposed an end date for a troubled relationship with the congregation, that the Board didn't want to simply push me out of the parish, and I should continue to serve and search. Yesterday, that same person returned to inform me that the pressure was ratcheted up, and I'm to be gone by the end of June. As is my modus operendi, I stayed calm and reasoned on the exterior, while trembling with fear and anger inside. That representative is attempting to set up a meeting tomorrow night to talk over and finalize arrangements for our departure faster than contractually required.

Fortunately, the landlady called yesterday and we told her; she took it far better than we had expected, stating that we had been good renters, and suggesting she won't hold us to the two month written notice because it is easier to find renters in summer than in winter. We still have a repair we will get done next week, and will have the carpet cleaned before we leave, even though it probably should be ripped up and replaced before the place is rented again.

Churches have long be known for their two faces, one compassionate and long-suffering, the other more flinty and abrupt. We knew this was coming, and have been trying to work around it, both with proposals for new ministry opportunities here, and in seeking a new location in which to do ministry. The former has met with stiff resistance at nearly every turn here, and the latter has simply not resulted in anything we felt confident about trying.

So now we attempt to exercise that trust that God is in control, our needs will be met, and there is something better yet to come. It is hard, there is no denying that; but can it be as hard of Jesus knowing his most trusted friends were involved in betraying, abandoning, denying and hiding from his trial? My life will go on, I will provide for my wife, in one way or another, and the sun will still come up tomorrow. In the meantime, I'll try to find a way to make lemonade out of this basket of lemons I've just been handed.

Peace!

Knowing when it is time

Yesterday I went to the funeral of a woman who had spent her whole life serving others, who had found her life's love 14 years ago, and who knew when it was time. She suffered from diabetes, had the toes of her left foot removed, then part of the foot, then part of the leg. When her kidneys went into renal failure, she simply said enough. Her loving husband took her home, and their loving church supported them, giving him time to be with her as she died, and supporting in other needful ways as well. That is a wonderful picture of the way church should work for all - one big, loving family, ready and willing to learn with each other, support each other, and offer both shared laughter, and shared tears.

The story of Jesus and the woman suffering from 12 years of internal hemmoraging was the text for the message, and as the preacher noted, it really seemed to discribe this amazing woman. She finally had had enough poking, prodding and trying one more thing, and as the preacher said, she reached out to touch the fringe of Jesus' robe. Through that difficult-to-understand, difficult-to-accept transition called death, her Savior made her well, made her whole. One of her classmates in a program to prepare lay members of our churches to assist in ministry and deepen their own faith, spoke of the same passage as the one this lady chose to preach from in the preaching class - where her transformation in the power of God became most evident - where she "blew us away with the Spirit-power of her preaching," putting all her own feeling of frustration with medicine into illustrating reaching out full of longing and hope to touch the fringes of the robe of this great healer, said to give hearing to the deaf, sight to the blind, mobility to those unable to move and life to the dead.

Again, what wonderful imagery of what our Christian life is to be about. Those are NOT simply stories, they are the stories of our lives as we struggle with things that don't make sense, disease that just cannot be healed, anger, hatred and life-crippling despair that controls a life that wants more. These are the stories to help us discover that Jesus is still here, though perhaps in the guise of a 55 year old woman who died from complications brought on by diabetes, or a soldier in the middle of a war-ravaged land who decides that little child with such a serious health problem deserves better, and uses all his or her pull and connections to get mother and child or perhaps family to a place where care can be given to at least this one small, desperate child of God.

May the joy this woman knew in her faith, the courage she showed in her determination of the end, and the serenity of her trust in her Savior become a real and lasting part of all our lives.

Peace!

A telling comment

I'm told my father-in-law once made a very telling, damning remark to one of those trying to keep a local church mired in a dead past. That comment was, "God calls you to be pillars of the church, not pillows of the church!"

Too many today want the church to be a warm fuzzy in life, no challenge, no responsibility, no accountability, just one nice easy ride. I make my public pronouncement, drop my check in the plate and show up occasionally. That's all I need to do, and God is obligated to let me into the new realm for my generous support of the church. Some believe that joining civic clubs counts for church work - I give my dues and extra money to help "the poor," participate in community minded events and that's all I'm required to do. Jesus will let me in. Some seem to think that running a corporation for a strong bottom line is what we need to do in order to be faithful.

Well, let's look to the roots of our faith - Jesus wouldn't allow the disciples to seek a warm fuzzy, he constantly challenged them to push their limits, to move outside their comfort zones and confront the wrongs of society. Jesus required more than attendance, more than a financial contribution, more than lip service. He required faithful living of the new covenant he was mediating. That new covenant required offering the same response to the marginalized that Jesus gave; it required the willingness to give away what would make me comfortable to help another live; it required the wilingness to expend my very life in order to help another find the God of love and grace Jesus preached. Salvation and grace are a FREE GIFT of God, not an obligation we lay on God by our marvelous good works - that was the route the Pharisees attempted to teach. Jesus didn't allow people to join groups where a morning or an afternoon of gardening made one feel the spiritual requirement was met; he required his followers to get into the gutter, to take the shirt off their backs, to take the food from their knapsacks and give it away to overwhelming numbers.

We also need to remember Jesus allowed the purse of the group to be held by an alleged embezzler, and extravagantly used the resources others gave to meet far greater needs than any believed possible. His belief was that God called him and us to do extravagant things, and would bless our efforts.

I know of a church of marginalized persons who formed with a promise to the United Church of Christ, that if allowed to pursue membership, they would tithe (10%) their income to the Association and Conference. They did so well, they were able to actually do that and more. They were so filled with the grace we want to claim that when the vote was taken on their potential membership, THEY asked for secret ballots so all could vote their conscience. And even though some unscrupulous clergy attempted to stack the deck, this fine congregation - and yes, I know of what I speak, for I followed their growth and attended their worship to find them among the most welcoming and loving congregations I've ever been around - was in fact voted in by a wide margin of first time attending lay people. In other words, the grace they acted with won the day in the face of liars, fear mongers and bigots.

An important point that cannot be stressed enough is that grace is the FREE gift of God! We can never, NEVER place God in our debt. A corporate understanding of the church kills the spirit, destroys the ability to engage each member in the special ministry to which the Spirit calls them, and leaves all stifled, unable to see the wonderful grace and new life God wants to share.

My constant hope, even in the face of those who cannot see the writing on the wall, is that the church catholic will finally come to understand that we are about ministry and mission, not a fine fat bottom line or staff that obediently walk the paths of comfort and warm fuzzy for us.

Peace - but not TOO much!!

Booglie-bashing

After a counselor treating me for clergy-burnout suggested I hoe the garden or pound nails while thinking of my most frustrating antagonist, I modified that when video games and computer games came along. I can deal with those people who drive me around the bend, because, usually, after an episode, I go home and engage in on-line gaming or fire up the PS2 and engage in some synthetic bashing. It hasn't turned me into a raving maniac, but it does allow frustration to be vented in a socially acceptable manner.

When I have meetings that are enough to have me gnashing my teeth, pulling my hair and talking in rumbling mutters, I look to the games to relieve some of that stress, vent some of the annoyance, and allow me to cool down enough to even think straight.

Sometimes I don't have that outlet, and those are the times I notice that the burn lasts longest. Lesson to be learned - find an outlet for that stress, whether it is gaming, building, hoeing in the garden, or pounding the tar out of a loaf of bread dough - so your true self can come through and really seek an answer, or see that this is one of those you simply have to listen to with half an ear and forget!

Peace!

Ooffda

My wife and I were comparing notes after an email post she read, and for the first time since about 1977, I haven't been into work all week. Fortunately my employment is such that if I miss a week, it doesn't destroy business. I think when I step into the pulpit tomorrow, there will be people who will ask why I'm back? I've been on antibiotics since Monday, slurping down codeine cough syrup and popping extra Vitamin C. For part of the week I've added Tessalon pearls. I've drunk fluids like they were going out of style. And I've found concentrating on anything to be almost more than I could do.

But now I've got to get back into it! Why? Am I being pressured by others to do this? No, I need to get back into it because enough is enough! I've just been given reason to start looking at post-retirement options to fill time. I've started trying to write a couple of times, so I'll be more intentional on that. I've enjoyed bird-watching for a while, so I'll try to be more intentional about that as well. I've done handicrafts in the past, and may pick that up. I'll also look at some volunteering, maybe getting back into youth soccer coaching, or baseball, or something. I've even considered taking training for intentional interim work - training to become a pastor who goes into a church between settled pastors with training to help them deal with issues that will impair their future ministry under a new settled pastor.

Little did I know that so near the completion of the Retirement Seminar, I'd be forced to consider some of what we talked about that day in a forced scenario. But it has been good for me. I know realize with a vengeance what others know - retirement can't be sitting back and doing nothing or one heads for an early grave!

So, with plans and hopes to help us get along with life after we severe that "pre-retirement" work situation, let's move through the future with an eye to what will happen when -

Peace!